Waking up, I felt drained
I couldn’t feel anything
Other than tired
So tired.

I showered in the morning
Unusual
For the first thing in the morning
It didn’t help.

I wanted to stay in the hot
Burning hot water
And to drift
To where I don’t know

I wanted to sit down
As he always did
Letting the droplets strike my skin
And empower me

I wanted them to hit me
As they did at the beach
When I threw them skyward
With joy

The sunlight turning them
Into tiny diamonds;
Small suspended oceans
For a time

Each drop carrying
Overwhelming energy
And spirit
But I couldn’t

I had to work
Where there are no nodes
To draw from
When you’re tired

Where the sunlight
Is trapped in a glass case
Near the double set
Of automatic doors

Where the weather
Is always the same
And regulated
By machines

Where the lighting
Creates an overcast
Manufactured
To trap you.